


I Don't Want to Die

by Megane



Category: Grey Is... (Webcomic)
Genre: Bitterness, Death, Friendship, Imbalanced Friendships, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, POV Alternating, Phone Calls & Telephones, Rescue, Suicidal Thoughts, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, old works, talks about death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-03
Updated: 2016-12-03
Packaged: 2018-09-06 07:00:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 557
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8739325
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Megane/pseuds/Megane
Summary: Ameer reaches out to Black once again to save him from the poison brewing in his heart, but bitterness, however small, stirs in them both.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Revamp/retouch of [the original _I Don't Want to Die_](https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10075981/1/I-Don-t-Want-to-Die) fic on FF.net.

        "But something about being this close to Death... It's like-"

There was a sigh between the two. Black leaned his head back against the wall and closed his eyes. Ameer hadn't said anything in almost a minute. Made sense. Black had been rambling all of the thoughts in his mind. It was all unfiltered worry– perhaps even meaningless…

        "Something about it is absolutely freeing."

        _"Black, don't say that."_

        Black chuckled. "No seriously listen." The white haired male turned his head to his left, brushing his fingers over the floor; a razor sat close to his foot, and he focused on it as he spoke. "Your mind gets really clear for a little while, and you can see all of your problems laying out in front of you. Before the panic sets in, you can see all of your wrongs and your rights—your failings and your achievements." He closed his eyes, a smile on his face. "It makes you feel like god for a moment. Seeing all of these things." He sighed. "And then… it all comes crashing down..."

        Black could hear Ameer's footsteps moving quickly against the sidewalk. He heard the concern in his friend's voice. _"We weren't meant to play god, Black. We're just ordinary people."_

       A bitter grin brought on lovely dimples. "Hmph! Maybe _you're_ ordinary—hell, maybe you can even say you're a 'person', but I don't think the same for me."

        _"Black—you're a person. You're my best friend. Just. Let me come over and–"_

        "There's no point."

        _"There_ is _a point! Come on! Just let me come over. We'll talk, and you'll see that this is just... You'll get over this. I'll help you."_

Silence came between them. A car passed by on the other side of the phone. Black drew his legs up and pressed his forehead to his knees. The smile had fallen from his face; his eyes was closed, dragging him into a more literal form of darkness. His fingers were trembling, or at least now he was aware of them trembling. His bravado fell, and the fear morphed out of arrogance into its true and colder form. Black curled his fingers against his leg.

Ameer stared down at the ground as he brought his mobile close to his ear. He heard the soft sounds of Black's movement, but things had gotten too quiet. It was unnerving. He pushed down the nervousness that threatened to flutter up.

        _"I don't want to die..."_  Black said weakly.

        Ameer closed his eyes, relieved at least to hear his friend's voice again. "I know..." He continued his stride, feeling his heart beating hard and fast in his chest.

        _"But you better hurry,"_ Black continued. _"I could easily change my mind."_

Click. The line went dead. Ameer looked over his shoulder before shoving his phone into his pocket. He hurriedly made his way down the street. Their conversation, admittedly, had been a bit scary for him. Black was at the end of his rope. Ah, but when wasn't he? Ameer shook his head, kicking that thought out of his mind. It didn't matter if this was another episode, if this was a lapse in Black's usual demeanor. Ameer didn't want to wait around and see if this would be the one time his friend finally snapped.

No. He just wouldn't let that happen.


End file.
